テーマ：「誰かに理解されること」
自分が欲しいと願う言葉を掛けてくれる人は滅多にいない。
けれど、ふと認められたり、心が満たされるような言葉を
掛けてくれる人と出会って話せるならば、それは重畳。
言葉にならぬ感情
受け入れられる 喜びを知らず
ただ一人 居場所を探し求め
大切なものを壊し 自分を見失ってしまう
いつも拒絶と 闘いながら
孤独な夜に 泣いていた
相対する世界に対して 疎外感を抱え
不合理な世界に対して 嫌悪感を抱いた
人々が笑い合い 仲良くする姿に失望し
世の理や常識に 違和感を覚える
わたしが私でいることに 疑問を感じて
他者が求める私を 演じたあげく
ホントのわたしが 分からなくなって
自暴自棄の衝動に 駆られてしまう
そんなわたしを あなたは理解してくれた
言葉にならぬ 感情も
自己を壊してしまおうとする 思いすら
あなたはそっと 受け止めて
わたしに言葉を 届けてくれた
あなたがくれた言葉の欠片は しっかりわたしを支えてくれる
あなたにだけは わたしの心を伝えられる
弱音を吐いて 頼ってしまう
理解し合えると思うからこそ ずっと話をしたくなる
でも、もうあなたの手には 触れられない
異なる世界に 暮らしているから
それでもわたしたちは 生きている
ただ、異なる道を 歩んでいるだけ
もう道が交わることは ないかもしれない
それでも 理解し合うことが出来ている
たとえそれが偶像でも わたしは感動を覚え
また受け入れられる喜びを 味わいたくなるのだろう
わたしはあなたに ありがとうを伝えたい
あなたと出会えた 一つの奇跡に
わたしは今も 胸いっぱいに
あなたがくれた 言葉を抱いている
深い感謝と 敬意をもって
この美しき世界を 讃えよう
あなたがくれた言葉と共に 自分を受け入れ生きるなら
幸せで満たせるのだと 知ったのだから
Translate this poem into English
“Unspoken Emotions”
Not knowing the joy of being accepted,
I search for a place where I belong, alone.
I destroy what’s important and lose sight of myself,
Always struggling against rejection,
Crying in lonely nights.
Feeling alienated from the world,
Feeling disgust for an irrational world,
Disappointed in people laughing and getting along,
Feeling a sense of discomfort with the norms and conventions of society.
I questioned my own existence,
Played the part that others wanted from me,
Until I no longer knew who I truly was,
And was driven to despair.
But you understood me,
Even the emotions that could not be put into words,
You accepted the thought of me destroying myself,
And gently reached out to me with words.
The fragments of the words you gave me
Support me firmly.
Only to you can I convey my heart,
I rely on you and speak my weaknesses,
Because I feel we understand each other, I want to keep talking.
But now, I cannot touch your hand anymore,
Because we live in different worlds.
Even so, we are still alive,
Just walking different paths.
We may never cross paths again,
But we are able to understand each other,
Even if it’s just an illusion,
I feel moved by it and want to taste the joy of being accepted again.
I want to thank you,
For the miracle of meeting you.
Even now, I hold the words you gave me,
With deep gratitude and respect.
Let us celebrate this beautiful world,
And if we accept ourselves and live with the words you gave me,
We will know that we can be happy and fulfilled.
The rewritten poem in English by using Chat GPT
Not knowing the joy of acceptance,
Alone I search for where I belong,
Destroying the precious and losing myself,
Ever fighting against rejection,
Crying in the lonely night.
Feeling estranged from the world,
Disgusted by its irrational ways,
Disappointed in people laughing and getting along,
Feeling discomfort with society’s norms and rules.
Questioning my very existence,
Playing a role for others to see,
Lost in the role, no longer knowing myself,
Driven to self-destructive tendencies.
But you, you understood me,
Emotions beyond words,
Even accepting the urge to destroy myself,
You spoke gently to me.
The fragments of your words
Firmly supporting me.
Only to you could I convey my heart,
Relied on you and spoke my weaknesses,
Thinking we understand each other, wanting to keep talking.
But now, we cannot touch hands,
Living in separate worlds,
Still, we live on,
Walking separate paths.
Never again may our paths cross,
Yet we understand each other,
Even if it’s an illusion,
I feel moved and want to feel accepted again.
I want to say thank you,
For the miracle of meeting you,
Even now, I hold your words close,
With deep gratitude and respect.
Let us celebrate this beautiful world,
And if we accept ourselves and live with your words,
We will know happiness and fulfillment.
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